Chapter Five

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Day Three, early afternoon.


The Goblin corpses are cleared away, but not before they are searched and then disposed of down the pit. We decide to retreat all the way back to the Kobolds, rather than continue the fight onwards as most of us are battered, or at the very least, depleted of spells.


With their barricades torn down and burnt, as well as their forces hopefully depleted, we hope that it is enough to give the Goblins pause before they send out any raiding parties our way.


The Bard and Barbarian lead the way, but decide rather than take us back to the safe area as previously indicated, that they would start exploring at a tangent, and open a previously unopened door.


The inevitable happens, and while I would not have immediately guessed that it would be a dirty swarm of rats appearing from behind the afore mentioned closed dungeon door, that is what we got. I say we, but I mean Kal-El and Bags, who are bitten many times and collapse under the black furry carpet of tiny toothed vermin.


Bags is in a bad way, almost dying from the rodents furious attack and while I clear a path to try help, it’s the Paladin that stabilises him. The rest of the rats are quickly stomped, punched, beaten and burnt, mostly in that order, and we pick up the unconscious but stable Bard and head towards a safer area.


[Bags levels while unconscious, he was that close last session]


With Kal-El cradling the stricken Bard, we get back to the safe and totally cleared out area that we should have gone to previously and spend the rest of the day and night by the fire, and all wake refreshed.


[The marching order today is the Bard and Paladin at the font; Cleric and myself in the middle; the Monk and Barbarian at the rear]


Back to the initial barricade and caltrop area, the Bard mimics the Rogue and hides in the shadows and moves ahead of us, scouting ahead. Soon, he stops to look back at us, beckoning us closer. He holds up a hand and indicates he is about to step round the corner, and as he does so,  he looks straight into the eyes of  a wizened woman who appears to be waiting to ambush us, who then slaps him about the head.


The Bard cries ‘bitch’, but is nearly dead from the necrotic power of the obvious spell behind the slap. He has enough time to register a much larger goblin behind her, before he unleashes his own spell, Thunder Waving the large goblin and old crone. The wave blasts the goblin away and staggers the old crone giving time for frontline Bard to run away safely.


The rest of us all hear this and I am first to react, but due to the tiny corridor we find ourselves within, I let others pass. Being further back and unable to get all the way through would seriously hamper everyone else, and so have to employ advanced (No, after you, I insist) tactics to fight in these enclosed spaces.


The Bard reaches us and gets to safety, while the Monk moves forward. St Vincent heals Bags but this does not retain his dignity, and the Ser Guildan and the other fighter types, the Barbarian and Monk move up eager to pit themselves versus the big goblin opponent.


Char is the first round the corner, but does nothing but illuminate himself and the front rank, while the Paladin moves past him, spots the crone and the large goblin, and moves into attack.


As Guildan gets close however, she reaches out and grabs at his sacred oath and with a scream and a twist, the Paladin drops dead.


[Paladin took a 36 damage critical and died instantly, losing his chance]


It’s now the Barbarians turn, and running in, he aims straight for the large goblin, who is wearing chainmail and wielding a sword.  They both lash out at each other but both miss a wounding blow, blades deflected off armour.


I still can’t get round the corner without trapping anyone, so stay on over watch, while Bags moves back round to cast Dissonant whispers on the large goblin, which to the surprise of everyone, including the Bard, falls dead from fright.


The Monk runs in further into the room, and as he is mostly blind here, uses patient defence to help him, but even with his Monkish defence, out of the darkness, he is shot twice.


St Vincent moves into the corridor to restrict movement even further, and the Barbarian runs in and is shot at by some goblins, and they club him as well for good measure.  


“I cannot see you, but I know you need me and my thoughts are with you, as the sounds of battle are quite terrifying” is heard above the sounds of battle as the Bard warms his engorged haggis and warbles bardic inspiration to the Barbarian.


Char punches another big dude, his poor choice in lighting just illuminating the first few in its limited range, and then the goblins attack the Barbarian once more, who drops from sustained wounds. The Monk is shot again, but still stands. The Cleric moves in and heals Kal-El so he stands up groggily and starts dodging on the spot like a punch drunk boxer.


I finally can move around the corner without hampering anyone else, and pulling some sand from my waistcoat pocket, sprinkle it while pointing at the back three Goblin Archers, who all succumb to my spell and fall asleep on the floor.


Bags mocks the Goblin fighting the barbarian, to put him off his strikes, and a sneaky Goblin from round the corner comes in to wake up one of the goblins. The big goblin has been pushing his way to the front of the fight, before squaring up to the Monk and as soon as he arrives, smashes his sword into the Monk, knocking him to the floor, dying.


The Cleric heals the monk enough to get him back up again once more, and then the Barbarian takes out the big Goblin with a sweep of his own giant sword. I sprinkle more sand indicating the rest of the Goblins still standing in this room, causing four more to fall to the ground snoring away. This makes a total of six sleeping bees if anyone is counting.


[I award myself +1 for the Wrath of Nickademus reference]


Char has shaken off the fatigue from the near death experience and kills a goblin with a palm chop to the neck. He punches another, but this one sadly wakes up. That Goblin then wakes another one, who then backs up and wakes up another.


[We forgot at this point that we should have had advantage and auto crits to sleeping opponents for those in melee range]


St Vincent Sacred Flames one of the Goblins that just got up, but misses, and the  Barbarian attacks and batters some more sleeping goblins, calling out that there are more goblins as well as another large one round the corner.


The Barbarian backs off, and the Rogue, Fiddler, suddenly appears from the shadows next to the Barbarian, to shoot a sleeping Goblin, killing it.


[Rogue running late to the session, arrives in style]


Bags finds that he has to take the cellophane wrapper off his sword to attack the sleeping things, and with a wrinkled nose and obvious disgust, leans over to poke his sword in the throat of the Goblin closest to him.


St Vincent wakes up a sleeping goblin with a poor Sacred flame, but the Barbarian javels him dead. Char finally kills the last sleeping goblin, and all is quiet.


Paladin is alive now, but very weak.


Once we have gathered stray ammunition and checked our wounds, we move into the large hazy room, with the torches that splutter. We then go back into the dragon room, to check to make sure that no one is behind us.


We move to the next door, and Fiddler cautiously moves closer, but finds nothing, and the Cleric takes the lead allowing the Paladin to get some rest.


Nothing happens as we continue along for a short while, until the front two spy the Goblin wizard and the Hobgoblin. She seems to have her arms up and out, and when the Hobgoblin starts to gesture towards us, she turns and blasts the Hobgoblin dead, surprising everyone.


Fiddler turns and runs at this point, leaving both St Vincent and the Gnome watching him retreat behind a corner before she indicates that she wishes to talk.


A few short whispers back and forth from the Cleric to the party behind the corner and we are moving as one back to the Dragon room to talk. A parley apparently; she wants us to leave the goblins alone, as she does not want us to kill and wipe out the tribe due to Dern the Hobgoblin chief orders.


She has the information we need about the missing humans as well as the monk fruit requests, and after switching to Elvish to discuss things in front of her, we agree.


She adds that we are quite easy to spot, as we make a lot of noise. “….are you sure that the noise did not make you give up?” Bags asks, casually prodding his swollen tartan noise cushion.


Somehow, despite this, she does give us good information. The main room has a well that dominates the whole throne room, of which the guards will try and knock you down it. She repeats that the well is a long and quite deadly drop for those not paying attention, and adds that any chests found are also likely to be trapped.


The Humans are alive the last time she knew of it, and there are two of them, a holy warrior and a girl. Durn himself apparently killed one of them, the young human male.


We move back deeper into the cave system away from Durn’s location for a short rest, not retreating we say to no one in particular. This short rest allows some of the more interesting party members to gain in power, while others glare with undisguised jealousy.


We prepare to move on to fight Durn and his guards, and it’s at this crucial time that Bags says to the Rogue “You’re a spiteful horrible wood elf, that’s why no one heals you.”


Not entirely sure what prompted this, but the Rogue is up ahead, and I am sure I see him wipe something from his eye. He returns shortly though, no indication that the Bards inspiration has given him restless thoughts, indicating that the way ahead is clear.

We go onwards, the Paladin back up front to kick the door in with the rest of us following closely behind. I say the rest of us, but I mean the people that forgot or chose to ignore the often-repeated part about the deadly well rush in, while the others stay in the corridor.


The room is domed and circular, and there is indeed a massive well surrounded by a knee-high wall dominating the entire room.


It seems that we have somehow surprised them, which is a first, and causes some confusion as those all quickest to move all instead wait for others to act. The Monk waits while the Cleric shoots but misses. The Paladin speaks holy words to the closest Hobgoblin, but this appears to do nothing, and the Barbarian also waits.  


Bags mocks the leader, and then I move up to a position to see Durn. I blur as I quicken my first spell, and three fingers light like candles. With a single flick, all three small flames arc from my fingertips to the target, growing from a fingertip in size to that of the size of a pumpkin, smashing into the Hobgoblin leader. Sadly, he turns at the last moment, and two large balls of fire smash into the wall behind him, dissipating on contact, with only one hitting him squarely.


Plucking a dust mote from the air, I then flick my fingers to ignite it, flicking it towards the creature where it blossoms into a bolt of fire, but again this strike misses, instead hitting the low wall protecting the well.


One steps out, and is shot and stabbed, but no one hurts it enough to stop it from grappling the Paladin to try and drag him off.


[He was actually dragged off, but Rogue reminded him he had +2, so that was enough to save him.]


The Cleric up takes a stance and drops his weapon, and so the Barbarian steps past him to grab the hobgoblin that tried to grapple the Paladin to try and drag him into the corridor. Phew. The Rogue aids the Barbarian dragging the dragger, and the Bard mocks another Hobgoblin that he can see.


The Barbarian continues to grapple the hobgoblin and succeeds in dragging him back down the corridor.  Three glowing darts of intense white light appear in my open hand, each of them twisting and turning like a compass, pointing toward their intended targets regardless the orientation of my hand, before gently lifting off from my palm. They quickly speed up as they near the Hobgoblin not fifteen feet from me, and all three thud into his chest and legs.


As the Hobgoblin shudders from the spell hitting him, the Barbarian drops the Hobgoblin and Javels it in the throat, killing it. The Bard then casts sleep into the room, but sadly this is not very effective.


Another Hobgoblin steps in to the corridor, and again tries to grapple the Paladin at the threshold, but fails to move him. The Cleric, next to them both moves to the Hobgoblin with a grey smoky looking hand to Inflicts Critical Wounds, but misses the target so badly he almost stumbles into the Paladin, who I suspect would not have been amused to have been touched again in this manner.


[Cleric rolled a natural 1]


The Barbarian who was already enraged, becomes even more terrifying as he frenzies, pushes past all the people blocking his way and cuts through the Hobgoblin blocking the door, before stopping just short of the last hobgoblin and the chieftain. Bags runs up to the door to get a better view, says nope at the scene of gore and bloody mess already in the room and the three big scary monsters (including Kal-El) and quickly runs back.


The Rogue sneakily runs in and hides low behind a wall, while I run in raising my hand. Again three fingers light like candles, and with a single flick, all three arc from my fingertips to the target. This time all three flames smash into the leader, his head and body ablaze as his armour and clothing ignites from the heat. There is a loud scream and he promptly trips over the low wall and falls into the pit.




The last hobgoblin shouts a battle cry and attacks the Barbarian, hitting him with a sword strike low in the thigh, and the Cleric moves up to burns a suspicious looking plant that he noticed had slowly started edging his way closer to the Rogue.


Kal-El absolutely smashes the hobgoblin down, his sword cleaving bone and cutting off most of its shoulder along with an arm, splattering yet more gore across a tapestry.


All is now quiet.



Played: 10/02/19

Attending: Barbarian, Bard, Paladin, Sorcerer, Rogue [arrived later], Cleric, Monk [Missing only the Fighter]





The Party

Humble Narrator and sorcerer - Solomun "Major" Tunde

Fighter - Abraham "Cut throat" Williams

Barbarian - Kal-El

Paladin - Ser Guildan

Cleric - ST Vincent

Rogue - Fiddler Topov

Bard - Miley Cirus

Monk - Char Siu Bao


and other supporting cast members